IF I had a dollar

So the past 9 years, if I had a dollar every time I heard "you don't look like you weigh that much", or "your so tall you can carry your extra weight". Seriously, I would have a nice little nest egg to retire on. HAHA. Now that I have let so many people in on what is going on with me, the new phrase is, "you don't look big enough to have that kind of surgery". ~~~~~sigh~~~~~~
Well actually I am not the typical weight loss surgery patient. I actually don't meet the requirements with just my weight. There are other problems you must have called comorbidities. Here is a paragraph from my hospitals website:

• Must 18 to 65 years old (exceptions are reviewed individually by surgeons).
• Persons with BMI greater than 40
• Persons with BMI of 35-40 with one of the listed comorbid conditions below:
  Diabetes mellitus, hypertension (high blood pressure), obstructive sleep apnea, degenerative joint disease (DJD - with documentation from an Orthopedic specialist that weight loss would greatly help), asthma, Obesity Hypoventilation Syndrome, or pulmonary hypertension.
• Persons with BMI of 35-40 with 2-3 of comorbid conditions listed below:
  Stress urinary incontinence, hyperlipidemia, gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD), polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS), non-alcoholic steatohepatitis (NASH), venous stasis disease.

I fit into the last category. I have a BMI of 35 with GERD, DJD, Asthma, and no thyroid. So when you think of a person having weight loss surgery, don't always assume its just about their size and weight. There are so many factors that go into qualifying for surgery. For me, its definately not about looks, but that is a bonus. I am so tired of hurting. There have been times when I have actually been embarrassed from pain. I either have to sit out of participating in things, or little things like sitting to long will "lock" my body up. I guess you would just have to experience it to understand it. And having fibromyalgia into the mix hasn't helped. Its bad enough to have bone and joint problems, then add the muscle problems. Lordy mercy on me...HAHA

So, where is my head today? I woke up thinking, ONE WEEK! I did get a few butterflies. I am ready for the surgery itself, but its always scaring having any kind of surgery. I worry about the "what ifs". I have had so many of them running through my head. I pray for a safe and speedy recovery. I pray everything goes as planned. It's in God's hands. The Lord has been so good to me. Is my life perfect, uhm NO! But he has given me life, my kids, my husband. I have a beautiful home, wonderful family, and great friends. My faith is strong, and I know he will not give me anything that I cannot handle. So where is my head now? Ready for next Thursday to be OVER! I don't know how well I will feel after, but I promise to keep updates going as often as I can.
So one week from today, my life is going to change.
My last thought is.......hmmmmm, ~~sigh~~